A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender - "Get everyone here a drink on me, and get one for yourself too" The bartender pours a round of drinks, including one for himself, then says to the drunk "that will be $45"
The drunk said - "I don't have any money" The bartender takes the drunk outside and beats him up.
The next night the same drunk walks into the bar and says to the bartender, "Get everyone here a drink on me, and one for yourself, too."

A patron ordered a Manhattan. When it was served there was a
piece of parsley floating in the glass.
"What in the world is this?" asked the man.
The bartender peered into the glass and replied, "That's Central
Park."