Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

After landing: "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Washington National, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"

A student was heading home for the holidays.
When she got to the airline counter, she
presented her ticket to New York. And as she
gave the agent her luggage, she made the
smart ass remark, "I'd like you to send my
green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase
to London."

The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't
to that."

"Really? I am so relieved to hear you say that
because, that's exactly what you did to my luggage
last year!"